none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
