I intend to get homeless drunk
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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