he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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