i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
