Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
then he tried to convert me to islam
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Randomize
