You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Found the puke drawer
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
why does every cop we meet know your name?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
