im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
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