found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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