How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
