Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize