I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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