plz talk dirty to me
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
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