I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
