Pants 0. Shit 1.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
