I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
