but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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