Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
