just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
