Me. At least after what I've been through.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
