I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
