so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
porn star boner night. come get it.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
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