Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
