um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
did you just send me my own nude
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
