How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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