i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
