You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Randomize
