Its about making memories worth repressing
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
