careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
