well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize