I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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