we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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