I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
