Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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