if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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