i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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