I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
