That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
