Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
