i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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