you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Someone signed my nipple.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
