i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
