I accidentally had phone sex last night
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
