Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
