i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
