we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
