if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Acid is not a monday night drug
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Randomize
