mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
This is my gift to your gina
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
