what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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