oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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