sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
